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Jennifer Hawkins: Feminist Icon and Super Hot Model Chick

So Jennifer Hawkins has appeared undressed and un-airbrushed in a Marie Claire shoot on behalf of the Butterfly Foundation and to promote positive body image to women. I see. Brave girl, huh? That lingerie-modelling, swimwear parading, supermodel-face-of-Myer, Miss Universe, she’s a brave girl. Is she serious? The image of the J-Haw that is bashed across our heads on a daily basis as the paragon of the all Aussie chick is enough to have most teenage girls shoving three fingers down their throat after a meal of steamed carrots, let alone a spread that demonstrates that even without computer manipulation she still is in possession of one of the world’s great bodies.

The message here is supposed to be what, exactly? That all women can look like Hawkins? That Hawkins, without computers, looks like all women? Great news if you’re a size 24 bushpig with splayed feet and ‘hair issues’ – you’re in with a good shot to be the face of a department store earning gazillions! Because, after all, she’s one of you.

It’s inconceivable that Hawkins is not aware of how much better she looks than most of the planet. Even on her most unslept, unwaxed, suicidally hungover, rogue pimpled, period-bloated day she is still hotter than 99.9% of people who have ever lived, let alone the fat-ankled, chafe-thighed, brain dread consumer drones who flood through the doors of Myer when DFO have run out of XXXL three-quarter pants and track suit tops.

Marie Claire, like most of the ‘female’ magazines that profess to be drivers of positivity for women, has again shown that it exists in a bubble and pursues no higher calling than moving magazine units. Which is all fine, if it didn’t stand on a botox box and shout to the world what a job it does of making women feel great about themselves. It has only ever been a matter of time before Australians tire of the ubiquity of the J-Haw brand. These things are only ever just a minor slip-up away. Perhaps that time is now. And that’s perhaps something women can feel good about.

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